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5 September 2007

life is good, it is, in fact, grand. just the pay sucks. there are so many wonderful things about living in Fiji and so many wonderful people. it’s only when you think about leaving that you realize that you forgot to do the things you set out to do. Me? i was going to learn to play the guitar and the ukalele…have i? well, along that same thread, i sorta forgot that i had 3 kids and my spare time would be very limited. So, i will at least say, that in the next several years, i will learn those both! i am also very hopeful that i will get into fitness for the sake of my future. that falls along the lines of ‘looking after oneself’ and i have fallen into that trap of a coffee diet and my physical fitness relies on the floor. -sweeping and mopping-. for an arm workout, i hang my laundry. never the less, i’m still kicking over here. and yes, Thailand is seeming like a possibility. there hasn’t been a job offer nor has anyone from our camp applied for one. just the very preliminary.  looking at medical, dental, education, shopping, housing,  people, lifestyle, you know …all the things we NEVER looked into when we moved here with  a 2yr old and an 8wk old!   i think i was just really desiring a change. boy, did i get it!  SO,   we continue to realize that our days here are numbered, in more than one way! and that our next destination is likely going to have this climate. i think i can safely sell my beloved columbia boots and snowshoes. (boohoo)  it is a  great great  lifestyle to  have year-round shorts and t-shirts type of weather. we  enjoy the outdoor lifestyle. right from our own little home. eating our meals outside, morning coffee on the back patio. playing puzzles on the front verandah. i like it here so it is time to go. when i first met Gerrys boss, he asked me prior to his signing our bonds, how long I thought WE would be here. i told him that  we wouldn’t leave until i loved it here.  i then told him that i hated it so far and that we’d likely be here for sometime. truth.

again, life is grand, pay bites a bit here so we are looking at the greener pastures. still!

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Oh oh…

4 July 2007
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so long, farewell, Auf Wiedersehen, goodbye….

2 July 2007

In the last 2 weeks we have had to say permanent goodbyes to some fairly significant people in our lives. That is, for Alec and myself. The friends that left were Moms with sons, that were best mates with Alec. The Moms of course, best mates with me.

When i first came here, Cass took me in and fed me coffee and biqqies and welcomed me into what was a ‘normal’ home by fiji standards. If it wasn’t for her i don’t think i would have thought it possible to remain here. She helped me in so many ways. too many to list here but just know that the last 4+ yrs involved her directly and her son in my life and in Alecs. She is a nurse in her past life and her medical info and insight has been indispensable to me in this phase of life with little ones. She’s a brilliant Aussie lass and will be sorely missed. She helped me, she was my first friend here. You might have to read between the lines to know how much she means to me.

The other mate that left was Trudi. her son Mitchell and Alec truely were 2 peas in a pod. I adored this little family and vice-versa. Trudi is likely the first person in my life i have referred to as ‘my mate’ and she truely is. I am so totally inspired by her positivity and spirit. Her laughter makes my day and i know that everything she means to me is what i mean to her. The day she left, it seemed like the sun was dimmer, life a little flatter and quieter.  When Alec said his goodbyes to Mitchell, it was a heart breaking sight. He was truely saddened and  aware of what goodbye meant. For the first time he experienced a pain that bandaids and ointment can’t fix. I had to just watch him and comfort him with words and hugs and let him know that i was feeling the same pain and that crying lets the pain out.  He hasn’t been quite the same since and I am sad to see him enter this next phase of life. the awareness that he has now that wasn’t there before. Yes, he has said goodbye but he was just ‘that much’ younger and unaware. I look at him now, a week later and still see an emptiness that is there. His eyes are looking for “Mitchy” and his heart yearns to hear his laughter. Much the way i feel about Mitchys Mom. Ahh, the rollercoaster of life and experience and awareness and all. It is too much at times. In this country, family is not an issue, we have none here. We made a family with these few friends and now they are gone and a selifish part wonders why. and ‘what about us?’ and everything inbetween. We wonder if we should still stay here or begin looking yonder. Maybe it will just fade, like the suns brightness did. maybe not. For now, we feel a little deflated and , well, empty.  we miss. but we will get used to it. After all, we’ve been thru this before.

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get this!

18 June 2007

today i was encouraging alec to pop outside for a play and maybe a swim in our little pool. he was bored a little bit and Eli was sleeping and Vaughn still can’t climb the mango tree so, i thot he would like a nice relax in the pool. this is when he told me it was “‘freezing cold’ outside Mom…are you kidding i might turn into an ice-block!” he was after all, wearing a long sleeved tee. i immediately went and checked the temp. like a good canadian, i keep track of the temps, even if it rarely moves on the up and down. yup…it was 30c people. PLUS 30c and my son was feeling the ‘cold’ of winter! weirdo.